


Not a Dream

by CherieoftheDragons (SignCherie)



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Assistant AU, Blow Jobs, Cunnilingus, Explicit Consent, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, First Time, First Time Blow Jobs, Oral Sex, Outdoor Sex, Vaginal Sex, garden sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-22
Updated: 2019-03-16
Packaged: 2019-10-14 17:25:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17512802
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SignCherie/pseuds/CherieoftheDragons
Summary: Ray has been dreaming about his assistant since the moment he laid eyes on her. Now he doesn't have to dream anymore.Shameless, romantic smut.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my submission for the Love/Lust for All Seasons calendar project, which I'm so proud to have worked on. Extras are actually on sale at the time of this posting, details at 2019loveforallseasons.tumblr.com. It's all for charity :)
> 
> Thank you to my wonderful readers -- I hope you love this one.

God, she was beautiful.

Ray had dreamed of a picnic with her ever since she came to him as his assistant, but the reality was better than he ever imagined. Seeing her in the garden, her silky hair blowing in the spring breeze, a soft smile playing on her lips — her beauty overwhelmed him. He wished every moment could be like this, just the two of them together, enjoying the flowers and each other’s presence.

She was his whole world. He wished he could tell her that.

He had made the sandwiches himself, as many kinds as he could think of. The strawberry cake, though — she’d surprised him with that. He’d only mentioned once that it was his favorite, but she’d remembered, and she cared enough about him to get it. His heart pounded at the thought.

Or maybe she just liked strawberry cake. Yes, that was more likely.

He couldn’t tear his eyes away from her, especially when she started licking frosting off her hand. The sight of her tongue gliding up her finger before her lips engulfed it made his breath catch. She noticed, then stopped, blushing prettily before wiping her finger on a napkin.

“Sorry,” she murmured.

He had to swallow before he could speak. “For what?”

Her eyes lifted to his, and she bit her lip. “Nothing. Nothing.”

He loved it when she looked at him like this, her eyes fixed on his, as if he were the only person in the world. Even knowing that his imagination was getting the better of him, that she could never care for him, her attention made him tingle all over. Whenever she looked at him, he wanted the moment to go on forever.

Then she cleared her throat. “You have something—” she gestured to her mouth “—here.”

“Oh.” Of course. That was why she was staring. Embarrassed, he reached up to wipe his mouth.

“No, it’s still — here, let me—”

She leaned forward over the picnic basket, reaching toward his face, and he drew in a breath. She was going to touch him. Was she going to touch him? His pulse raced at her nearness. She was even more lovely this close to him.

With her hand near his mouth, she hesitated, staring at his lips, making his breath come faster. Then, slowly, she leaned her face closer, and before he knew it, she had pressed her lips to the corner of his mouth, her tongue gliding against his skin.

His heart stopped.

The moment was brief, far too brief, and in an instant she had pulled back to look at him, gazing up at him from under her lashes. “Was that… okay?”

He tried to speak, but he couldn’t find his voice. Instead, he nodded, a quick movement that couldn’t hide his longing for her.

A sweet smile crossed her face, and her pink cheeks turned even pinker. “Can I do it again?” she asked in a voice barely above a whisper.

It took a few tries, but he managed to croak a single word. “Yes.”

With a deep sigh, she leaned forward, this time brushing her lips softly over his. Her movements were slow, reverent. Every caress of her lips sent shivers through his body.

She was kissing him. _She was kissing him._

Was this a dream?

She moaned against his lips, and he felt his member starting to harden. _Not a dream,_ he realized. She was too real to be a dream.

His heart was racing. What was he supposed to do? He’d never done this before, never imagined that someone like her would ever want to… would ever even consider… How was he supposed to move his lips? He wanted to touch her, but was that okay? Surely she would get angry if he put his hands on her. She deserved so much better, she deserved—

With an irritated noise, she broke the kiss, and he panicked. No, no, she’d figured it out. She’d realized how unworthy he was and changed her mind…

But she only pushed aside the basket between them to crawl forward, putting a knee on either side of his legs and wrapping her arms around his neck.

Thank god. Oh, thank god. She wasn’t stopping.

Still afraid she would push him away, he stretched his neck towards her, hoping against hope that she would kiss him again. And she did, oh, she did, returning to the feather-light caress of lips that left him trembling in his desire for more.

“You can touch me,” she sighed. “If you want.”

His heart leapt. Yes, he wanted to. He wanted it more than anything. His shaking hands rose uncertainly, hovering over her hips.

“Yes,” she breathed.

The word gave him the courage he needed to take her hips in his hands. In response, she moaned and sucked on his bottom lip.

His heart was pounding. He was warm all over, far warmer than the cool spring air should allow. His greatest dream was coming true. She was kissing him, touching him, letting him touch her. This, this was true paradise, beyond anything he could have imagined.

When her arms loosened around his neck, his grip on her body tightened instinctively, frightened she was leaving, but instead of breaking away, she moved her lips to his jawline in a series of soft kisses that sent his head spinning. Her hands reached for the lapels of his jacket, and she pushed it down off his shoulders, sighing against his skin as she did so.

With a gasp, he pulled back, dizzy and confused. “What…?”

Her breathing was heavy, her eyes dark. Was that because of him? Had he affected her that much?

“I…” She hesitated. “I… want more. Do you… can we…?”

“More?” was all he could say through the haze of lust.

In response, she touched a finger against the skin of his neck, then trailed it down his chest, his stomach, lower…

He was frozen, entirely under her spell. Surely this couldn’t be happening, she couldn’t want…

Her fingers slipped under the bottom of his vest. “More,” she whispered.

_Not a dream. Not a dream._

“Yes.” The word was out of his mouth before he could even think.

Needing no more encouragement, she tugged at his jacket with her other hand. Reluctantly, he released her hips to help her take it off completely. Her hands moved to the buttons of his vest, undoing them with nimble fingers.

He was completely hard now. Impossible to resist her touch. Impossible to resist anything about her. Not that he wanted to. The only thing he wanted was her.

Frantically, he pulled off his cravat and gloves, then helped her remove his vest and shirt. As soon as his torso was exposed, she reached for the hem of her dress and yanked it up over her head.

She was completely bare beneath it.

He lost the ability to breathe, lost the ability to do anything but stare at her. So much beautiful, smooth skin. Everything about her was exquisite… her round breasts, the curve of her stomach, the patch of hair at the junction of her thighs…

He couldn’t think. Blind lust washed over him, and before he knew what he was doing, he reached for her, his hands finding her waist and pulling her close. The feel of her soft breasts pressed against his chest set him on fire. Of their own volition, his hands began to move, roaming over her back, her shoulders, her arms…

With a whimper, she grabbed the back of his head with both hands and pulled him in for a searing kiss. This was nothing like the light pressure of her lips before. Her mouth was demanding, insistent, urgent. He melted under the heat of it, the pads of his fingers digging into the skin of her back. When her teeth nipped lightly at his bottom lip, he gasped, and she took the opportunity to slip her tongue into his mouth.

_This can’t be real, can’t be real…_

Her tongue found his, sending a bolt of pleasure through him. He quivered as her hands slid down his body, finding the button on his trousers and fumbling with it frantically. The palm of one hand brushed over his erection, straining against the fabric, and it jumped at the contact.

Then the button was undone, and she lifted herself off him, tugging at his waistband. An ache went through him at the loss of her touch, but he joined in her efforts, and in seconds, both his trousers and underwear were gone, and he was completely exposed.

She stopped moving entirely, staring down at him with darkened irises, her cheeks flushed pink. Her eyes fell to his hard shaft, and she bit her lip.

Did she like what she saw? He was so scrawny, so ugly. Surely the sight of him would repulse her. And yet… she wasn’t going anywhere. She hovered above him, her gaze roaming his body. There was no way she could like it, but the look in her eyes, the heavy rise and fall of her chest, seemed to say otherwise. She was here with him in this moment, choosing him. And it was real.

“Can I…” She hesitated.

“Anything you want.” The words were easy, the answer to any question she could possibly ask.

With a sigh, she reached for his hard length, her fingers lightly brushing over the head. A choked moan escaped him at the contact. The soft pads of her fingertips glided down to the base, then back up. They played along the ridge of the head before moving up to the bead of precum at the tip, spreading it over his sensitive skin.

Good god, she was killing him. He thought he might die, and yet he prayed she would never stop.

“Anything?” she breathed.

_“Yes.”_

Upon hearing the word, she slid backwards, giving herself room to lower her head to his shaft. This time, she wasted not a moment in teasing, engulfing him in the heat of her mouth.

He cried out, his body falling backwards to rest on his elbows. In response, she hummed, sending a wave of pleasure through him. One hand wrapped around the base of his member, moving in tandem with her lips, stroking what her mouth couldn’t take in.

Oh god, it was so good. Beyond anything he could have imagined. Far beyond the fantasies he’d conjured as he pleasured himself, alone amidst the computers in his room, images of her dancing before his closed eyelids. The reality of her made every joy he’d ever experienced fade away into nothingness. She was the only thing in the world now.

It couldn’t be a dream. His paltry imagination could never create this.

The suction of her mouth was too much. He was going to finish if she kept going. No, it was too soon, too fast.  She’d be so disappointed in him if he couldn’t last. Oh god, he needed to hold out, but he couldn’t, he couldn’t…

“Wait,” he gasped.

Immediately, she released him, and he wanted to take the word back, to feel her mouth on him again, filling him with ecstasy the likes of which he’d never even dreamed of. But no, no, she was more important. He couldn’t finish now, not without returning the favor, not without making her feel as good as he did first.

“Is something wrong?” she whispered.

Ignoring his throbbing cock, he pushed himself up to sitting, reaching for her uncertainly. His hands touched her shoulders, and he leaned in closer, still afraid she would push him away. But she didn’t. Her lips met his in a breathless kiss that sent shivers through his entire being.

“I want to…” He murmured the words against her mouth.. “How do I… do that? For you?”

She groaned, pressing her lips even harder against his. One hand reached for his, drawing it away from her shoulder, leading it to cup her breast.

He lost the ability to think.

Pulling back, she moved her lips to his ear, sucking the lobe into her mouth, then releasing it. “Touch me. Please.”

He didn’t need to be asked twice. The hand on her breast squeezed lightly, his thumb brushing over her nipple. It pebbled under his touch, and the sight left him awestruck. His other hand trembled as it slid down her body, coming to rest on the curve of her buttock.

“Ray,” she gasped. “More. Please… kiss me. Everywhere.”

Yes, yes, yes. He needed to have his lips on her. Bending forward, he pressed his mouth to her neck. He wasn’t sure how to do this, so he left light little kisses on her skin, starting under her ear and moving lower, trailing down her throat.

“More…”

Heart pounding, he continued lower, pausing at her collarbone when she gasped. Experimentally, he sucked gently at the skin there, and was rewarded when she rolled her hips.

“Ray, Ray…”

In an instant, she grabbed his shoulders, pulling him to the ground on top of her. “I need you, Ray.”

His shaft twitched at her words. Again, he put it out of his mind. No matter how badly he wanted to sink himself into her, there was no way that act could give her enough pleasure, not with him. If he were someone better, maybe — but he was just himself, just Ray, and so he had to make sure she felt as much pleasure as he was capable of giving.

So he lowered his lips to her again, moving down her body. When he reached her breasts, she arched her back. Uncertainly, he pressed a kiss to one nipple, and when she moaned, it gave him the courage to wrap his lips around it, sucking it into his mouth.

“Oh my god, Ray—”

One of her hands came up to pinch her other nipple. Was he supposed to touch them both at the same time? He moved his lips to the one she was touching, flicking it with his tongue, and her hand fell away. The fingers of his other hand brushed over the nub he’d just abandoned, and the whimper she emitted set him on fire. Yes, he was doing this right. She liked what he was doing.

Her hands clutched at his back, and her hips thrust up towards him, rubbing against his stomach. He was wasting time on her breasts when clearly she needed — what she’d done for him. She wanted to be touched… lower.

Reluctantly, he released her nipples, sliding his mouth down her abdomen. Everywhere, she’d said. She wanted him to kiss her everywhere. And he never wanted to stop.

When he reached the curls at her center, he hesitated again, insecurity washing over him once more. She was so beautiful. Surely he couldn’t really be allowed this honor, the privilege of seeing her up close like this, touching her, tasting her—

As if reading his mind, she spread her legs, exposing herself to him entirely. His heart stopped, then started again at a mad pace. She was the most exquisite thing he’d ever seen, her beautiful folds open to him like the petals of a flower.

And it wasn’t a dream.

Hand trembling, he ran his fingers down her slit, amazed at the wetness that coated his fingers. She groaned, a beautiful, frustrated sound. “Ray, please,” she begged. “Don’t tease me anymore. I _need_ you. Please.”

Was he teasing her? He hadn’t meant to, but when he peered up her body, the desperation in her face was clear. A surge of pride went through him. She was desperate for him. He was the one she wanted. Impossible, but real.

He couldn’t keep her waiting any longer. He might not know what he was doing, but he was determined to give her pleasure, and he would find a way. Pressing his lips to her, he gently licked up her slit. She let out a low noise, her pelvis thrusting up and nearly dislodging him.

_“More.”_

Encouraged by her reaction, he took her hips in his hands, holding her in place. His tongue repeated its action, up and down, gradually increasing speed as her figure writhed beneath him.

Suddenly, her body jerked, hard, and she cried out. “Oh, god, Ray, yes. There, right there!”

It felt like magic, one little nub eliciting such a reaction. Determined, he focused his attention on it, and the sweet, frantic noises she made spurred him on. He tried different things, circling it with his tongue, flicking it directly, sucking it into his mouth…

Her body was quivering. It took all his strength to pin her in place as her hips rocked urgently. Her fingers tangled in his hair, grasping it so hard it hurt. He loved every second of it.

“I’m close, I’m so close, oh, _please_ , Ray—”

God, yes. His shaft ached for her, but that didn’t matter. _He_ was making her feel this good. It was his name she called as her body shook with need. He wanted her to feel amazing, he wanted to bring her so much ecstasy she couldn’t think. She was the only thing that mattered in the whole world, just her and her cries of joy and the beauty of her trembling form.

She needed to come. He needed her to come. Sucking hard on her bud, he licked it frantically, willing her to finish. _For me, for me, for no one but me…_

WIth a choked cry, her body went taut. Her fingers tightened in his hair as she jerked beneath him. The sounds that spilled from her lips were like music, a beautiful melody he never wanted to end.

Finally, she loosened her grip on him, and he raised his head, his face wet with her juices. He’d done it. He’d brought her this joy. His member was throbbing almost painfully, but that didn’t matter. She was happy. She had what she needed. He couldn’t expect her to give him anything more.

She sat up, and the dazed smile on her face dazzled him. Gently, she pushed at his shoulders, and he sat back on his heels, unable to look away from her, the heaving of her perfect chest, the emotion in her eyes that was almost like… almost like…

...love…

No, no, he mustn’t think such things. Wiping his face on his arm, he tried to push the thought from his mind. She didn’t deserve to have him project such fantasies onto her. What she’d just let him do was more than he could ever have dreamed. It was more than enough. He had no right to imagine more.

But how would he go on without her touch now?

Before he could think any more, she crawled forward, climbing into his lap and crushing her lips to his. Her hand reached between them, taking hold of his throbbing length and leading it to her entrance.

At his gasp, she pressed her lips against his harder, her other hand coming up to hold his head in place. What was she doing? She couldn’t really be… she would do that… with him?

“You don’t have to—” he said against her lips.

She pulled back barely an inch. “I want to, Ray. I’ve wanted this since the moment I first laid eyes on you.”

His world spun on its axis. “You—”

Her lips moved to his jawline, kissing it softly. “Every day I’m with you, I only want you more. If you don’t want this, please tell me now. Because I want you so bad I can’t think straight.”

This couldn’t be happening. She—

“Ray?” she breathed.

“Yes,” he groaned. “God, yes.”

With a sigh of relief, she lowered herself onto him.

He thought he might die. She was so hot, so tight around him. Inch by inch, he slid into her wet sheath, revelling in the velvety feel of her. Her gasps and moans made his shaft pulse inside her.

When he was fully sheathed, she shuddered, her head falling back, the action thrusting her breasts towards him. Unable to resist, he buried his face in her cleavage, leaving a series of gentle kisses on her soft skin.

With a desperate noise, she began to move above him, using his shoulders as leverage. The sensation was overpowering. He’d never felt pleasure like this before, never imagined it was possible. The physical sensation alone was beyond his wildest dreams, but it was more than that. It was her. It was _her_.

And she was everything.

He could do nothing but cling to her hips as she rode him from above. She had complete control over him, and he was elated to relinquish it to her. Her moans were getting louder, more frantic. She was enjoying this. Enjoying _him_. She took her pleasure from his body, and he reveled in every moment of it. He was good enough to please her this much, without doing anything, just letting her take what she wanted.

He was the one she chose to give this to her, and that was beyond any honor he could ever dare to wish for.

God, it was _so good_.

He’d heard that women didn’t usually come more than once. But he wished she would. He wanted his body to give her so much pleasure that it couldn’t be contained. His own need was building, filling his body, too quickly, too soon, but he couldn’t control it. She had all the control, and he couldn’t hold out.

Maybe… what he’d done before…

He moved his hand, stretching out his thumb to reach between them, caressing her clit. Her moans immediately became louder.

She was the world — she was everything — he wanted her to know, he _needed_ her to know—

 _“I love you.”_ The words fell unbidden from his lips.

At that, her body shuddered and went taut, back arched as she cried out in ecstasy.

He’d done it. He’d _done it._

Her climax seemed to go on forever. She had stopped moving, but he continued to rub her center, and she continued to shake as tremors wracked her body. Finally she let out a groan, pulling his hand away and pushing him down onto his back.

“Ray.” His name sounded like a prayer.

Yes. _Yes_.

Above him, she rocked her hips, riding him even harder and faster than before. It was too much. It was not enough. Oh god, she was so good, he was so close, he was going to — he was going to—

Pleasure exploded through his body, filling him, consuming him. She was amazing, she was beautiful, she was everything. Not a dream. His shaft pulsed hard as his seed spilled into her. She didn’t stop moving, and the ecstasy kept coming.

Finally, the tension left him, and she slowed to a stop. Leaning forward, she pressed a single, soft kiss to his lips and said the words he’d been dreaming of. But this time… this time, it wasn’t a dream.

“I love you, too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have decided to continue this! Chapter two now up!


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to all my readers! I've decided to continue this. There's no smut in this chapter -- sorry -- but there will be plenty in the next one!
> 
> The first chapter was in the 2019 MM calendar zine, but from here on out, it's all new. :)

Ray’s heart was still racing as he closed the door to his room, collapsing back against it with a sigh. That couldn’t have just happened — could it?

It could. It had. Raising a hand, he touched his fingers to his lips, remembering how beautiful hers had looked, all red and swollen from kissing. From kissing  _ him _ . Did his look the same? Had every Believer he’d passed in the hall been able to tell what he’d just done?

His hair was sweaty, strands of it sticking to his forehead. A shower. He needed to get clean. Pushing away from the door, he hurried to the bathroom, anxious to finish quickly and be back to normal. If anyone came to the door, he couldn't let them see anything amiss. 

Stripping quickly, he stepped into the shower, then hesitated before reaching for the faucet. He should take a cold shower, as usual, to wake himself up. He’d need to be awake for all the work he had to do…

With a start, he realized there was very little left for the night. She’d been working so hard, all day long, focused even more than usual and rushing through the breaks for food he’d insisted she take. Her last words to him tonight lingered in his ears, spoken softly between little kisses. 

_ “Sleep well tonight. I'll meet you in our dreams.” _

Now he understood. She'd done it on purpose. She'd worked extra hard to get it all done so that he could sleep. What's more, he realized with a shock that she'd been doing this for some time. Little by little, with her help, his work hours had decreased, and he'd had more and more time at night to rest. 

His hand hovered over the faucet, and then, impulsively, he turned the water to hot. The warm spray washed over him, comforting and pleasant, as his mind went back to the events of the night. Her soft hair, her perfect breasts, the feel of her clenching around him…

This was wrong, he wasn't supposed to think of her this way. She deserved better…

_ No _ . It wasn't easy, but he pushed the thought from his head. She'd chosen him. She… she…

…loved him. 

She  _ loved  _ him. 

He lingered a long time in the shower, reveling in that truth. She loved him. He loved her. They were in love. His heart was so full he was certain it would burst. 

When he finally stepped out of the shower, he caught sight of himself in the mirror, and the sight made him freeze. Normally he avoided looking at himself. He didn’t want to see how skinny and ugly he was.

But now — was that him? He was still thin, no doubt about it, but he didn’t look like he remembered. He was used to seeing his ribs under his skin. Now… he might be skinny, but he looked…

Healthy.

That was because of her, too. She’d taken to refusing to eat unless he did as well. He wasn’t sure what his Savior would have thought if he’d had more food brought for himself, but feeding her — the Believers had no qualms about bringing her as much food as she requested. And she shared it all with him.

He hadn’t thought to look in the mirror since then. He’d been unbelievably thankful to not feel hungry all the time, but it hadn’t occurred to him that he might look different. Maybe he wasn’t so ugly after all. Maybe… maybe he was attractive enough for her now.

No, impossible. Thin or not, he could never be attractive enough for her, as perfect and beautiful as she was. Still, he didn’t feel the shame he would normally feel when looking at himself, and that was…

…wonderful. 

Something loosened in his chest. For some reason, he started to feel a little bit — free.

He dressed in a daze, then took care of the few tasks left for the night before slipping into bed. For the first time in ages, he fell peacefully asleep.

He couldn’t remember his dreams when he woke, but he felt so light and happy that he was sure they had been about her.

 

* * *

 

As Ray waited for her to arrive in the morning, he couldn’t focus on anything. He knew he should be working, but he found himself pacing impatiently instead. The events of the last night suddenly seemed a million miles away. What if she’d changed her mind? What if she’d realized she’d made a mistake? What if she didn’t want him anymore?

The click of the door opening startled him out of his thoughts. He spun around to see her stepping quietly into the room, shutting the door behind her carefully before turning back to face him, her expression unreadable.

No. Oh god, no.

Then her shoulders relaxed, and a soft smile quirked the corners of her lips. She took a step forward, and he unfroze, his own feet carrying him toward her. She met him halfway, throwing her arms around his neck as he slid his own around her waist, pulling her tight against him, hardly able to believe she was real. Without thought, he sought her lips, and she returned the kiss fervently. It was clumsy — he still didn’t know what he was doing, really — but a sound of pleasure escaped her, sending shivers through his body.

When she broke the kiss, it was to nuzzle her face into the crook of his neck. “Thank god,” she said. “I almost thought it was a dream.”

“I did, too. It’s real, though, right? I’m not going to wake up?”

“It’s real. And if we do wake up, I’ll find you again and make it happen for real.”

He let her words wash over him, feeling warmer and lighter than he could ever remember feeling. “I love you,” he whispered, needing to say it out loud, needing her to hear it.

“I love you, too. I love you so much, Ray.”

He’d never believed anyone would say those words to him. Tilting his head down, he claimed her lips again, and when she sighed into the kiss, he knew for sure he’d found heaven.

Pulling back an inch, he whispered, “You won’t leave?”

Her fingers tightened around the fabric of his jacket. “They’d have to tear me away.”

And just like that, reality hit him like a bucket of ice water. Tear her away— 

That was entirely possible. 

Ray had never given her the elixir. Never put her through an initiation ceremony. If anyone found out — what would happen? Would she be cleansed? Taken from him?

It was nothing for him to be cleansed. He could endure the agony. He’d take any pain, so long as she wasn’t hurt.

But if they came for her…

He realized he’d tightened his hold on her, digging his fingers into her back. With a deep breath, he forced himself to relax. It would never happen. She was too good at what she did. There was no reason to cleanse someone as perfect and wonderful as her.

Her face was serious now, her brow creased in thought. With a small nod, she released his neck, leaning forward to press a quick peck to his lips before extricating herself from his embrace entirely. He wanted to grab her again, pull her back, but when she took her place in front of the screens, he knew what she was doing was right.

 

 

* * *

 

Ray threw himself into his work that day, and she did too, her fingers flying fast over the keyboard as she peered intently at the screen. She’d learned so much in her months with him, and although she was nowhere near his league, having someone to take care of the basics while he focused on the intricacies of the most detailed code was a relief beyond anything he’d expected. He wanted to push the keyboard away, to grab her and hold her in his arms, to think about nothing but her. But working hard would keep her safe, and he needed to protect her more than anything else in the world. Still, with her right there, so close, so warm and lovely…

…He blinked, and suddenly he was no longer at his computer. He was sitting on her desk, and she was in her chair before him, staring at him with wide eyes. He had one finger under her chin, lifting her face to his. He could feel a smirk on his face.

No. Oh god, no, no, no, no…

Horrified, he pulled his hand back, clenching his fingers shut and pressing his fist to his heart. God, what had happened? What had he done? 

“I’m sorry!” His voice was quivering, and he squeezed his eyes closed, afraid to look at her. “Oh god — I’m sorry, I’m so sorry—”

Her small fingers touched his, pulling his hand away from his body. At the touch of her lips to his knuckles, his eyes shot open. She rose from her chair, tugging on his arm to guide him to his feet, and when he stood, she wrapped her arms around him, rubbing his back gently.

“It’s okay,” she said. “Everything is fine.”

His body was trembling. He clutched at her arms to steady himself. “Are you okay?” His words carried all his fear and desperation. “Did I hurt you? Are you hurt?”

“I’m not hurt. You didn’t hurt me. It’s okay, Ray.”

Her soft tone was a comfort, reassuring him that she was all right. “Promise you’ll tell me if I ever hurt you. Please, promise me.”

She nodded solemnly. “You have my word.”

Of course, by the time she told him, it would be too late.

She rested her head on his shoulder, her hands still rubbing his back. “It will be okay, Ray. I promise. Everything will be fine.”

She couldn’t know that for sure. Still, he closed his eyes, and at least for this moment, he let himself believe her.

 

**Author's Note:**

> If you're enjoying this, please consider leaving an encouraging comment :)


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